Human instincts are hard-wired in all of us, whether it is to feel fear, hunger or happiness. We pick up on everything, from what someone is wearing to what someone is doing with their time. When we are observing others, it is common to judge them, whether it is good judgment or bad judgment. Everybody judges someone at some point. But why? And how does this affect human connection?

According to Dr. Janet Frick, an associate professor of behavioral and brain sciences at the University of Georgia, we are always subconsciously perceiving others. It is human nature to pay close attention to the actions and behaviors of others and to perceive how one is acting. 

 “We are all very prone to stereotypes,” Frick said. “These stereotypes can absolutely lead to passing judgment before getting to know them. We all do this — the best thing to do is to be aware of what we are doing.”

The stereotypes are formed and evolve throughout our lives, and essentially result in us judging others, even if it’s subconscious. “The ability to make judgments is rooted in our need to evaluate [a situation],” Frick said. “Judging is an instinct we have just as social animals.”

Mandie Michaels, a high school student from Milton, Georgia, said that she can’t help but judge people sometimes. “Judging is a human instinct, I think everyone does it once in a while. It’s just the way the mind works,” she said.. 

According to Frick, Michaels is right. While we often associate judging others with negative intentions, there are also ways where judgments can have a positive connotation. 

“Judgment isn’t always bad,” Frick said. “If my neighbor gets up and goes for a run every morning, I may make a judgment that that person is very health-conscious and disciplined, which shows that judgment can absolutely have a positive impact.”

Maika Walker, a high school student from Atlanta, said she notices that some people act in a way in which they want attention, and that’s typically when she finds herself judging them. “Judgment isn’t really making me feel better about myself or making them feel worse, I usually judge when someone is doing something that grabs my attention, it’s almost like they want us to judge,” she said. “Sometimes people set themselves up to be judged.”

Additionally, judgment can impact how people build relationships with others. It is common for people to judge others before they really meet, just with one glance in passing by. Judging someone before really getting to know them can be questionable, as it is hard to tell who someone is as a person before speaking to them. However, doing this isn’t really bad or good, it’s an instinct we have to seek out people similar to us, as that makes us feel safe. If we sense someone is different, we can immediately think to judge who they are.

“We have a tendency to seek out people who are similar to us, that helps to reassert our own choices,” Frick said. “It is an inherent bias to seek out people we see ourselves in.” 

Judging others is a natural human behavior that we all experience to some degree. While it can be harmful and unfair in certain situations, it also is a way for us to form opinions and figure out a sense of what is going on around us. By acknowledging that judgment is a part of human nature, we can work towards finding a healthy balance between being critical of others and being more understanding.

On the weekends, typically on Saturday mornings during the school year, I go out of my way to choose to spend at least an hour or two alone. I take time to read, clean my room or simply just relax. I like to spend time alone, not because I feel lonely, but because spending time alone helps me feel calm. Studies have shown that spending time alone is highly beneficial, as it allows for us to recharge. 

When people are too busy and do not spend enough time in solitude, they can experience feelings of frustration and burnout. A 2022 study by PyschCentral stated that a lack of alone time can lead to feelings of anger that can be taken out on others, an experience that professionals have called “aloneliness.” Spending time alone can regulate emotions and relieve tension, two things that many people need. A lack of spending time alone can lead to a decrease in mental health, possibly leading to a decrease in physical health, which is why it’s important to make sure to spend time alone often. 

Spending time alone can also help bring out one’s creative side. A study by the Jed Foundation found that when one is alone, they are more likely to try things they may feel uncomfortable doing in front of others. Trying a new activity by yourself can eliminate feelings of judgment and embarrassment, allowing one to try new things without fearing the thoughts of others. 

Additionally, spending time alone can provide one with a deeper understanding of who they are. One could learn more about their interests, dreams, hopes and dislikes by spending time to themselves and reflecting on their life choices. When I am spending time alone, I find that I feel calm and relaxed, which helps me to think clearer and more thoroughly. Spending time alone brings self reflection and more self awareness, and I truly think that it is beneficial for everyone to spend at least an hour a day alone.